My Most Personal Blog Post. Eh-ver.
I debated about posting this. Had a little tussle with myself over it, in fact.
See, it’s personal. Very “behind the kimono”, to quote my friend Trey Ratcliff.
But then I realized that if you’re here, chances are great that you’re a way-seeker too. Maybe you’re multi-talented or multi-passionate (if so, you’re a “polymath!”). You seek inspiration, the “a-ha” moment, the brighter light and meaning of life and ways of weaving it together into something awesome.
This is a rant of sorts…although rants are usually negative. This anything but! It’s something I shared with a Mastermind group I work with. Then decided that it effects everything that happens next in my world – and you’re a part of it. Think of this as the Preface to a book that is being written in the stars NOW!
Fair warning: this one’s for the brave. It’s long. It’s for those who muse, perhaps with a glass of wine or steaming mug of coffee in hand and some nice music.
Sparks & “Batching”
Sparks are a’flyin! I feel like by the time I finish writing this, it’ll be old news. But I have to share NOW, since this is all leading to ‘what’s next’… which is something that’s been on the slow burn build for quite some time. Like, my whole life. But lately maybe about 6 months in a nudgier, more insistent way. It’s about my business, yes… but more, it’s about that pivotal point where business and life blend together and ignite into something more than either one.
This post got sparked by…
Me, just sitting there, innocently reading Melissa Cassera’s “Batching” guidebook. (It’s free! And… whut?? You don’t follow Melissa? Fer goddsakes, SIGN UP for her newsletter! She’s genius. And high-larious.) “Batching” is all about a system for getting your writing done at once and LOVING it, instead of in a one-by-one, as-needed panic mode. I have so much to write and do, I’ve been feeling overwhelmed. “There MUST be a way to git’er done with some grace and ease!” I cried. And BAM – Melissa showed up with the goods.
As I read this little gem that is about to change my life for good… more tasty nuggets begin falling from the sky. They include juicy bits for my business, of course. And… Photography. Speaking. Writing. And teaching again (Probably sooner than later, it now seems.). And then… VOICE is back?? WTF? I shriek: “I’M ONLY ONE PERSON!!!”. [That was fun. Demure smile]
Kicking Into A New Gear
60 years into this game’o life and I feel like I’m just starting to take off. Why? Because I now have a still-growing and developing body of work (which includes, but isn’t limited to, photography) to draw from that is so layered, so rich, so unbelievably varied, it surprises even me.
It’s developed over a lifetime. Pro level riding and training horses (Dressage, Jumping, Driving), acting (stage, TV, film), dance (ballet, jazz), singing, voiceover, voice coaching (TV/News Broadcasters, business), fitness (aerobics, back in the day), figure skating, personal development… and teaching all of these things in actual careers! To me, it’s always made perfect sense as part of my personal evolutionary curve. Especially since it all emanated from a vision I had as a child. (You can read about that on my About page. Yup, it actually happened!)
But that way of living wasn’t always welcomed in a society that believed that you could only do one thing well. Doing more meant you didn’t have “stick-to-it-iveness”. No one grasped that I was THAT good at ALL of it. And God forbid you toot your own horn about that – especially as a woman. Just. Not. Done.
NOW: it’s on. The exact kind of background I’ve had is now a HUGE asset. (I always knew it would be.) And for the first time, connecting these multi-faceted dots in practical, shareable terms is EXACTLY what’s calling.
At the moment, “Batching” is giving me a new look at how to sink into the writing part in a saner, more productive way. That’s überness of great, because holy crap do I have alot to write!
As I look over all my notes for books, eBooks, giveaways, programs, etc… as I take in the myriad of inspirations that are coming in right now… the lessons begging to be taught… the programs that are nudging at me to create them… the photographic beauties that are edging their way out of me… my mind starts to whirl. ACK! What’s the common piece? The thru-line? Where’s the one gossamer thread that I tug that reveals the amazing technicolor garment of glory that I was meant to be wearing, sharing, radiating? You see, I know there IS one – I’ve always known it. Heck, I had a freakin’ VISION about it when I was 8! I’ve been willing to wait for it to be revealed in physical reality, even as I kept moving through careers, life and its many lessons/experiences. Good thing I have longevity in my family! heh.
HERE’S THE AMAZING COFFEE DISCOVERY
This week I realized: I’m actually creating my life’s work. Literally. Right here, right now. As we speak. Not just my next business move (Well OK, that too). Not only trying to organize my daily life & tasks (though that’s high up there). Not simply trying to strategize my business and opportunities for the coming year (I’m taking some dramatic steps there… you’ll be hearing about it!). It’s ALL of that. The whole shootin’ match… EVERYTHING amalgamated into a shiny ball of radiance & resonance.
It’s that thing that I came here to do/be/say/channel/light up. That piece I leave behind to (hopefully) shape the minds generations (I love writing stuff like that. haha.)
It’s taken a lifetime of acquiring master-level skills in a ridiculous number of careers. Gaining perspectives from a myriad of POV’s. Being a child with visions. Walking to the edge of the abyss of depression. Coming thiiiiiiis close to dying from a bone infection (really, couldn’t have been any closer). Training horses, dancing, figure skating, speaking, acting, photography, voiceovers, voice coaching… professional at all of them, coach to all of them. WHO DOES THAT???
I do that.
All of it.
And the information gleaned from it all is relevant NOW, more than ever.
I sat up suddenly this week and thought “HOLY SHIT. IT’S GAME TIME.” Up till now I felt a bit like I was sitting on the sidelines. Gathering, learning, acquiring, radiating, emanating… but quietly. At least in my mind it’s been like that. Because to me, it’s all been compartmental. Everything had its own room. Figure skating didn’t know about riding (not kidding!). Riding didn’t know about acting. Voiceovers couldn’t know about ANY of it! It supposedly made you less legit if you had more than one focus, interest or talent. But I felt like I was here to live in the whole house, every room, each inter-connected, filling the world with light and life in an intricate resonance and frequency of beauteous design.
Photography has felt the closest to “It”… I mean, come on… I literally create with/spin light. I giggle every time I think of that. It’s SO “on purpose” and awesome fun. But even that – as soul-freeing as it’s been to embrace it and go deep – it was never the whole picture. It DEFINITELY provides the awesomest flash cards EVER and is the leading player… but it’s not the whole shootin’ match. There’s more.
When I stood up and talked about Voice at SHINE live (read the post here)… something shook loose in me. In a good way. It happened because of the response, which was phenomenal. It was the antithesis of anything I’d experienced before. My voice mentor always told us we were ahead of our time with it… I just didn’t know she meant 35 YEARS ahead of our time! I doubt she did either.
So that got me puzzling over how – or IF – to re-incorporate voice into the equation. It’s SO KEY. And I thought alot about WHY it’s key. It’s not just about the voice itself, though that’s huge. It’s more about the stuff encoded within it. My nattery voice piped up: “Holy crap, you already have more going on than we can deal with alone. And now… VOICE added to the mix again? Yoinks.
Finding Your Voice
Then it hit me this week… the connecting point in all of this, that makes all the parts sing together as one… IS the voice. Your one, true voice. The one that resonates clearly through every single, lickin’ thing you do. Freeing it is not just about having a good voice, or good art, or more fun, or whatever (although it’s all-inclusive of those things)… it’s unleashing the power of your soul/spirit/all-that-is/God. It’s the resonant voice (the speaking one – AND the one you express in the world) that throws down and leaves NO DOUBT as to who you really are and what you’re about. It’s the ONE voice and frequency that changes everything. Not that I say it like that to just anyone… but you’ll get what I mean.
Finding your voice… no matter which way I turn it, stretch it, flip it over, dangle it upside down from its delicate little ankles… it rings true. And covers an INCREDIBLE amount of territory. Like, everything.
It’s about resonance. Literally!
It’s about light.
It’s about putting LEGS on your freakin’ LIFE.
It’s about sourcing the energies that create worlds… by being your own truest art… reverberating and resonating as your truest YOU, in a frequency that emanates only the highest light. YOUR voice… in everything. Imagine being or having in your home – a frequency that no darkness can touch. This is key for our times… and it’s finally practical. I’ve waited a lifetime for this.
Because where there is light, darkness flees.
NOW is the time. WOOT!
THAT was my vision as a young’un.
Now I’ve got the tools. And not just one toolset, but many. Many people study a lifetime to acquire even one of them. I’ve been blessed, for SURE!
Waiting For The All-Spark
In my business, I’ve been waiting, holding back, listening for the “go” button on where to go next. Where to REALLY pour myself. It’s why you haven’t seen a steady flow of books and courses and workshops and all that other stuff from me, even though folks have been asking. It’s been more like…
Knowing there is a K-Hutt “all-spark” just about to boot up and come online… one that will literally be the hub from which every single frickin’ spoke emanates. It feels just like that. Sure… I can create books, programs, sell prints, speak, etc. etc. and freakin’ etc…. but I need the one tone that sings “THIS IS ALL-SPARRRRRK. GO. NOW!” It’s taken longer than I thought it should (in my tiny little mind, anyway!)… but now it’s looking like perfect timing. Imagine that. Thanks Universe! One thing I’ve learned: the all-spark is always right. In All Ways.
I tend to go all-in, as my bestie said to me the other day “with both feet… like a cannonball”. But this time, I’ve been holding… listening longer than usual. I’m poised. Ready. Having to remember to breathe. My highest guidance has been right there… saying “wait”. Be patient. Listen. Watch. Even as I take my actions and do my doin’s. I’ve known something was coming, I could feel it, taste it – if I could just hang in there for it to emerge, without leaping with impatience and turning into a human battering ram. Again.
So, dayum. Here it is. Life’s work. I’m practicing saying that. It’s bigger than I expected. And totally all right there. No drama, just THERE in all it’s bigginess.
I don’t have all of the “Whats” and “Hows” of all this yet, so in that sense this story is more about the “moment when everything changed”. It’s an internal shift that I’ve been waiting for. The flip of the switch on the all-spark. Heh.
The what’s and how’s will be along shortly… and those will be easier to report upon and share with you.
This may seem a little amorphous. I hope not – because it’s so “out of a cannon” to me! It’s a little challenging to put into words. Even so, I wanted to speak all of this into THIS space. Because we’re all on this journey. And when 2 or more are gathered… well, you know.
Plus, cool stuff is coming.
License to bring it ALL in.
The boot-up of the all-spark.
Big love, big light.
Photo: taken with my Fuji X-T1, 16-55mm lens.
It’s from a section of the Pacific Crest Trail in the Sierras of California, near where I live.
It was getting close to sunset and yes… that beam of light was really there. 😉